Wednesday, December 31, 2008


Love ... Life...


It has been more than an year since I posted on my Feelings. Well it took a lot of time to actually feel you know!
There have been so many changes in life that it is no more identifiable. Change. It often happens.At times its unnoticeable and at times it makes a huge difference to our lives. Something similar happened to me in the past one year too.


I have been to India, after an year and a half of my Masters and staying here ,the last December and enjoyed being there and spending time with my parents and sister for the New years. Had a blast! Another interesting event which took place last year was that I crossed the 25th milestone of my life and hence the sudden wake up call for the parents that the girl has to be married! Then started the match fixing and I had to say yes to the first match I saw.( Nothing wrong with the guy! Just that I could have married after my masters.) Sudden calls- meeting a couple times- and there I go! I was booking my tickets to India again in just a months time. I went back home in early March and came as a new bride back to States.
All the changes happened so fast that, now I look back and I feel as if I had a new year party with my family just yesterday and now I am here all alone trying to finish up my masters all alone for this new years.

There were some sad moments while parting from my loved ones.That last glimpse of the ones I loved, my family, my sister, my Kozy- very emotional sendoff. Few of them I guess I can never meet again. I came back to hear a sad news that my Kozy in no more.Though I knew it is going to happen soon, the news hit me hard. A new life. A new person.Its different.It so damn different and weird initially to get up with someone totally unknown to you. It took me real good time to accept the Change! I am still getting used to it though!

A new friends circle. A little less communication with my old friends and JOSH.Lost touch with a few others. It became a new world and a new beginning I could say. Amidst all this new phase arising in my life, my masters project is set aside and now I am trying to catch up and finish it soon. Priorities changed a lot.

I used to have a huge connection with regard to traveling in my yester-years. I have very fond memories of my childhood bi-cycle(bsa-slr), then a black sunny, then a honda activa and then a few trips on my dad's ford. The engineering college bus trips, the regular howrah mail travel from chennai to vizag during semester breaks, the rare flight journeys using my dad's airline points. I just loved traveling. My wildest dream would be me driving a racing car! After marriage and me still studying and my husband being in a different place, Amtrak was of so much help.( trains... tracks and me have a great connection i feel!) I traveled so much that i started hating trains. Then we got a car for just three months and I drove so much that the word car makes me crawl and hide under my bed. I drove thousands of miles. I loved traveling, but I would not want to do it so much that I start hating it. I wish I would rather have a fun trip than anything else.
Things have shaped me to be a more mellowed, reserved and even boring person!

I wish I bounce back. Hard and with a bang!
Here I am, trying hard to motivate my self to have a better career, live up to my own standards, and enjoy each and every passing day and to welcome a new year, a new life and a new beginning. Hope this new year brings in more peace and safety and a better world to live in.
Welcoming the new beginning and waving bye to year which gave me love ,memories and a new life.
An unforgettable 2008.

Promising to post more often.

Feelings are fickle and keep swinging!

4 comments:

Radha said...

'ello gal!!

Yup, marriage does change things a lot, doesn't it!! My life basically revolves around work and cooking and cleaning - It is just way too tight to allow a bit of relaxation (not cribbing, really) - you are right about priorities changing drastically, it has been the case for me too...Change is a part of life, the seasons change every year, the day changes into night and night changes into day, however, it is difficult to accept it, but maybe we can try to look for the good in this "change" to keep ourselves motivated...!

I hope you do find a lil' time for yourself and "find yourself" once again...!!

:)

Radha said...

BTW, I am also sorry that you were traveling so much that you started hating it!! Long distance relationships are very hard, just hang in there, buddy!

Call me sometime, if you do find the time!!

J-O-S-H (My Bench !) said...

hi da..
Thanks for sharing some space here. Trust me traveling and work and deadlines are really frustrating.
Though i am cribbing about it, i am actually liking the transformation. I hope it will all be fine at the end.
call u sometime soon. Waiting for the new pics from India, not much uploaded in your blog.

Radha said...

Yeah, "Everything is alright in the end, if it is not alright, it is not the end"...

Will upload pics soon, I am trying to find time to process the pictures... really busy with work!!

:)